Oohh lala @Duncan, you so fancy Enjoy the open air cinema- friends visiting always chases the blues away.
This is going to sound brutal but no I don’t think he is remotely worried, I asked him that exact question. His reply ‘well you’re either going to be ok or you’re not, nothing I can do’. Pretty hurtful, but I was a teenager once too, so I’m not going to deep it as they say. His answer to why was - ‘everyone does it it’s no big deal’. Aside from it being illegal until he’s 18 and potentially having permanent health consequences of course…
Wow that’s a great reminder I will use that for her as yes not all family members abide !!
We ended up walking by the sea and going for coffee with his Great-Nanny yesterday. It was wonderful to watch my mum in her mid-80s pushing him along—such precious memories.
Life has a way of coming full circle, and with his Great-Granny on the other side sadly missed, having those generations together feels all the more special. Days like yesterday are a real reminder to slow down and just enjoy the moment.
Hey lovely @2DB hope you’re enjoying the more normal summer at the moment. When in August? So that I remember to check in with you. I have my next bmb, hospital sign off and next steps all in August - big month! Xx
Hi spangles I’m back 10th August
Big steps indeed for you.
About your boy at 15 he hasn’t got the maturity to express how he is really feeling and the reply he gave you don’t take it to heart. I’m sure he is bothered
My boy was 19 when I was diagnosed. I told him and my daughter as soon as I found out. He listened then said can I go out with my mates now. He rarely if ever spoke about it. I think he finds it too painful
Saying that he has been taking me to my recent appointments
Keep an eye on him as boys tend to not say anything and get angry with the situation and acting up
Just let him know you are there and will try and answer any questions he may have.
Would he be up to having a bit of him and you time over a milkshake/coffee/ chocolate in a cafe
I find my boy talks away from the home usually in the car
Ha yes it’s fancier than I tend to enjoy @Spangleystar! Can’t wait to hear about her Californian experiences of living in Europe and vice versa
And bless your son, peer pressure can make people do stuff ridiculously out of character, all while feeling like there’s nothing he can do to help you. I like @2DB’s car talk idea—that used to work really well with older teens I worked with who needed an ‘adult’ talking to. I used to drop in the occasional swearword too to make them think they were being treated in confidence more like an adult! I’m sorry it’s been so hurtful, but you know the sensible person he is underneath this current phase.
You are so right about teenage boys; they often process things in their own time and in their own way, even when they seem a bit detached on the surface. That story about your son asking to go out with his mates made me smile—it sounds so typical, my girls were in their early twenties one just about to start uni and one just about to go to Australia for a year when I was diagnosed! The even tougher part was their Dad ( me ex husband) was diagnosed with lung cancer at the exact same time !
I’ve been looking at a few resources on how to help with these conversations with family and teenagers, which I found helpful:
Thanks @DuncanB yes I’m doing well, my mental break has been really helpful- bone marrow biopsy today, pushing those MRD -ve vibes out into the universe and only 10 days left of my 100! How are you doing? Xx
Yes although I don’t have paraproteins, if my light chains rose I’d definitely be stressed, so it’s hard for me to want that for you. But if it gets you on this trial I’ll hope for it with you xx
Good luck my lovely @2DB I’ve been hoping the numbers have been high enough just to get you on the trial. Also re the lovely BB as well as us @ing her here, I have emailed her and not heard back - I’m hoping she’s just taking a mental break from it all and not unwell. I don’t want to keep tagging her in case it’s pulling her back when she’s intentionally keeping herself away, but I would love to know that she’s ok xx
Thank you all for your concern, I’m ok, just took a leaf out of book and stepped back for a while.
I see I have lots to catch-up on? I’m hoping you are all doing ok, it’s been a long hot summer x @Spangleystar I only just saw your email, it had gone in to the spam folder I hope your 100 has been uneventful and you have something lovely planned for day 100 xx
@2DB fingers crossed that you get on your trial and get treatment back up and running and you settle into it well xx
@DuncanB hope you have been getting out on plenty of walks and taken some lovely pictures x
Yay! Welcome back my lovely @Byrnebaby I hope the mental break did you good. Nothing planned for day 100, but on day 101 (which is our 17th Wedding Anniversary) we’re headed to Dorset for the weekend!
You’re over halfway now - is it day 54/5? It will fly from here on in. How are you feeling? Hoping your strength is coming back and the side effects are decreasing.
Enjoy the open air cinema- friends visiting always chases the blues away.
book and stepped back for a while.
I hope your 100 has been uneventful and you have something lovely planned for day 100 xx