Hi @Faith2023 and welcome to the forum. I’m so glad you posted. It sounds like things are really tough at the moment. There is so much to take in and to get your head around and the fatigue must make all of that so much more difficult to manage.
Have you got friends and family who are able to help and somebody to come to the appointment with you?
I wonder if a call to the support line might help - only when you are ready. Sometimes it just helps to talk things through, especially before your initial appointment.
I think we will all completely understand wanting to hide and scream. I know I felt like that, especially at the beginning when I didn’t know what was going on and what the plan was. Everything can feel very out of control. On here you can just say it as it is - we are all here for you X