Morning All. I’m lying here, struggling to get back off to sleep and was just curious about others sleep patterns. During the day my mind is kept busy and I can go for longer periods not thinking about my lymphoma. However, at night, when I’m tired and desperate for sleep - my mind has a different idea! I find it extremely difficult to relax. I’ve tried music and audio books and this is somewhat effective in helping me get to sleep (at times) but I more than often wake again. This is the loneliest time for me. Do any of you have the same problem and have found anything useful to help? I know it will never be perfect but if I can improve it a little I’m hoping the fatigue might improve a little too X
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It’s exactly the same for me Nichola.
I fall asleep very easily, going to bed 10ish but I’m wide awake at 4am, sometimes even earlier
I no longer even try to go back to sleep, I get up and read.
I’m always tired after lunch so I get a two hour nap then to catch up.
It’s a lonely time that early in the morning and unless you can keep your mind occupied self pity creeps in.
I was wide awake at 3.30 myself this morning and have been reading to keep my mind from straying to dark thoughts.
Give it a try, believe me it does work.
Anthony
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I totally relate to your problems with sleep. I often wake up at 3 o’clock in the morning and find it difficult to get back to sleep. I call it being in the wide awake club !! During the day I am able to sideline anxious thoughts about my illness but I suspect they are there in my sub conscious and interfere with the quality of my sleep. If I cannot get back to sleep rather than looking at the ceiling for 3 hours, I get up make my self a cup of tea and either read or put the tv on. I have found that talking to my husband about my fears and hopes helps to release hidden anxieties. You will find a way that works for you, but at least you know you are not alone in having this problem, I know many people at my hemotology clinic who have the same problem.
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Hi Anthony and Kim. Thank you both for your replies It’s great to hear I’m not the only one! (Well, not great for any of us but hopefully you know what I mean!) I think I need to take a leaf out of both of your books and get up instead of focusing on getting back to sleep. At least if I get up and rest it might be better than tossing, turning and thinking. My mind can be occupied with reading or tv for a while! I’m going to give it a go. Fingers crossed and wishing you both well x
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Hi Nichola, what a good post and as the song says ‘the darkest hour is just before dawn’ and it is so, so true. My mind has nothing apart from dark thoughts to obsess and think about then. It might sound weird but what seems to help me is to accept that it is happening to me and just trying to get as comfortable as I can (not too hot or cold, although I like to have the window open a bit) and let the thoughts just come out and try and relax and I go to sleep a bit quicker than if I stress and fight it. As to the fatigue I think I understand mine better and manage it better.
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Hi Erica. I think you’re right. Trying to block it out as well as trying to get back to sleep is a bad combination. I’ll be taking all of the advice I’ve been given today and giving it a go! Thank you for your wise words once again x
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Hi Nichola, please let us all know how you are getting on. Mind you I think it is often me wanting to go to the loo that wakes me up. One positive advantage is that I saw a stunning moon the other night. I will probably wake up in the night tonight wondering how you are getting on!!!
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Erica, that made me laugh! I’ll be sure to let you know!
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Hi @Nichola75 @Blackhat @Alfie @Erica. Like Erica I often wake because of my bladder which goes into overdrive at night-time, but usually manage to drop off again pretty quickly. During my many hospital stays I began to use Molton Brown Ylang Ylang linen mist and body wash. M&S also do a sleep range. Lavender is also supposed to be good. I also try to relax my body by concentrating on each body part, tensing and relaxing from toes upwards, including screwing up my face and relaxing, then my whole body. Hope someone may benefit from this. Sweet dreams
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I’ll try anything! Thanks for the tips and a very merry Christmas xxx
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Hi Nichola,
I can absolutely relate to this - I’ve found my over thinking is a nightmare a lot of the time, but especially at night. A couple of tips I’ve used are: mindfulness, it was difficult at first but it’s really helping me now. It helps you to shift your focus from your thoughts to your breathing. There’s some good books out there or free stuff online- search MBCT or mindfulness 
The second is to write in a journal, just before bed, that way you can transfer all the stuff in your head on to the paper and it will hopefully stop everything spinning around your head. Hope you had a restful Christmas and good luck! xx
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When I suffered with tinnitus I bought a machine which makes soft noises like the sea washing up the beach it helped and it may help you.
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Hi. I’ve been trying mindfulness and am persevering so hopefully that will help. I occasionally journal as well but tend to do this when things really get on top of me but perhaps before bed and more frequently might be more beneficial. I’ll give it a go. Thanks for the tips. Wishing you the happiest of New Years x
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Hello @BeatingB-Cell,
This is really interesting - do you have any other recommendations that you have tried which have helped you at this time? It could be very valuable for others in similar situations.
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Just an update. Getting my thoughts onto paper has really helped. My mind is freed from juggling them around and I can process them more through writing. It’s still not perfect but definitely getting better. Although it means staying up a little later I am making sure I have everything organised before I go to bed so that I’m not doing it before I go to work in the morning. Kids lunches, school uniform and dinner prep for the next day of poss - stops me worrying but need to balance it with making sire there is time for relaxation as well! X
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What wise words Nichola, it also helps me to organise what I can and free my mind up. I like to go to bed with a clean slate where it is possible. Also time for me to relax is so important. Perhaps this site does help with writing thoughts down, I usually have rather a lot of thoughts revolving round in my head, which does not aid relaxing and sleep. Do you write a lot?
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Hi Erica, happy new year! I do write quite a lot. I think it’s so hard to explain verbally how
I’m feeling and I just end up crying! Therefore, sometimes writing not only helps me to organise my thoughts but has helped me to explain to others as well X
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Have you tried reading to relax Nicola? It works for me.
I can’t remember where I read this quote————-
“ I’ve never known of any distress that an hours reading doesn’t relieve”
I live alone and am often consumed by dark thoughts about my very uncertain survival.
It’s worse last thing at night.
Pick up a good book and you’ll get absorbed in a good story which will banish dark thoughts, relax you and lead to a restful night.
Best wishes
Anthony
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Hi. Yes, I do read quite a lot, somrtimes it help and sometimes not but it definitely helps x
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Good for you, anything that helps is a bonus 
Anthony
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