Anyone had this then started 7 days of growth hormones? Any hints/tips to deal with the huge anxiety I have about this next step please? 
it’s breaking me apart, I feel as though any sort of ‘normal’ is beyond reach
What can I expect from this process? I have read some awful stories on Facebook
Maybe a call to the Blood Cancer Nurses on this question is the best option as I’m sure they will be best placed to advise @Byrnebaby
Call us for free on [0808 2080 888](tel:0808 2080 888) (Option 1) to speak to one of our Support Service Nurses in confidence.
Our phone lines are open:
@Byrnebaby I’ve only just seen this lovely, how did your first injection go? Do you have to have the same level of dose as I did (2 jabs) or is it less because it’s over a longer period?
I’m hoping you slept like a log last night after your dex night before. How are you feeling today about it all?
I’m off into London again today, but I’m so fed up of paying for first class and it being ignored in rush hour and me risking being covered in a cough and sneeze fest -I’m driving myself up 
I haven’t driven for 2 hours since before I got ill, so it will be weird and I have to get used to traffic again 
I get stuck behind the odd tractor round here . Hopefully I’ll get my labs today also so I know what I’m definitely going in with. Better not be bad news as I’ll have to drive myself home xx
@Spangleystar my dearest 
it most absolutely will not be bad news!! How brave are you driving fot 2 hours?! That a helluva journey! Totally get you not wanting to get on a train! Hubby say in the car park for 4 hours waiting for me on Monday, didn’t want to sit with people in case he caught something and passed it on to me, he was waiting for me by the Loos by the Christie restaurant, and a worker was coughing call over the food prep area 
no masks in the hospital at all!
1st jab was ok, I’m just on one
daily big mothers! 6 to go! Let us know how you get on sweetheart 
@Byrnebaby
Oh jeez that’s awful hygiene! Well done hubster for staying out of the way bless him 
Yes they’re the same, I had to have 2 of those each day for 4 days (then needed the day 5 booster to go again the next day of harvest), hopefully doing it at a lower dose will be a gradual building and release and maybe less contraction like pain than I had - keeping fingers crossed for you that is the case as you are going through enough 
Have a great day lovely BB xx
Hi @Byrnebaby,
I am so sorry you’re struggling. My biggest tip is to stay away from Google and social media. In my experience, they are rarely helpful and usually just fuel anxiety with “worst-case” stories. People rarely post when things go well, but it happens more often than you’d think!
I had nine rounds of R-CHOP and, honestly, I sailed through eight of them. I found that my mindset made a huge difference; I kept telling myself, “I am fine, this is just to make me better.” On the one day I let the negative thoughts win, I felt much worse physically.
While everyone’s journey is different (my sister had a much tougher time than I did), please know that it is possible to have a smooth experience. Don’t let the horror stories convince you that you’re destined to suffer.
One hour at a time: “Normal” feels far away because you’re in a high-pressure week. Don’t look at the whole mountain, just the next step.
If it gets too much, please call the Blood Cancer UK Support Line on 0808 2080 888. They are brilliant at helping you find your feet when you feel like you’re spiralling.
@Spangleystar thanks beautiful! So many different types of delivery eith the health trusts isn’t there? You take care today in the big city x
Thank you @Jules I’m actually feeling a lot better today, son has given me a good talk 
I’m to see everything as a step to where I need to be, and each jab, appointment etc now is proudly being crossed off x you’ve been through and awful lot and I’m sorry your sister is too, x
I got here without any dramas or significant traffic, although my left leg totally shut down from being stuck in the same position for over 2 hours and I hobbled out of the car - good job I drive an automatic
I really hope I can be in and out today I’d like to be back on the road before 3 as rush hour wouldn’t be fun!
Hope you have glorious sunshine and are making the most of it @Byrnebaby xx
Ohhh @Spangleystar sounds painful!! Hope you can get a coffee and relax before you head in?! 
everything crossed that you’re in and out and it’s all good news x
Cleaning! I think this shot has given me an energy boost! Xx
@Spangleystar hope all went well and you got home safely xx
Thanks lovely @Byrnebaby I’m home, traffic was awful and it took 3.5 hours though, I was so glad to get out of the car.
Doc was very positive with my numbers /general health going into this and obvs gave me the bad news stats but it is what it is, just have to hope for the best don’t we xx
Morning @Spangleystar I’m so glad you got yourself safely home, that was an awful lot of driving in one day for you, I do hope you were able to relax and most importantly sleep, once home x so glad Dr is happy with you, and yes ‘that’ talk isn’t the nicest to have, but we have to try and forget it and that can be hard x we need to focus on how relieved we are going to feel when we walk back through our front doors 
and just finally breathe, as we’ve climbed that mountain we’ve been on since last year 
I know today is going to be quite emotional for you, thinking of you 
here for you x
Thanks my darling BB you’re such a support. We will do this together, like a couple of marathon runners helping each other to the finish line (on a serious note never ask me to run a marathon )
Had a poor night’s sleep, nearly 4 whole hours. I’m not intentionally thinking about it and I’m letting it float (the f ) away when it does pop up but it’s clearly made its way into my subconscious 
I’m now officially shielding now until admission on Monday, grateful for my online physio session for some human interaction today and hoping the workout will help me sleep well later.
How are you doing my lovely, GCSF going well? How are you feeling after the cyclo? Really hoping you get some great time out in nature over the next few days and it lifts the weight somewhat xx
@Byrnebaby also the 90% get sepsis piece, beautifully unpacked by my favourite AI to be far more palatable.
@Spangleystar yes we will cross that finish line! I’ll be a little behind you finishing, but will watch you win in awe xx those sneaky 
thoughts! It’s a very hard thing about all of this isn’t it, can be occupied and laughing and talking, then something sneaks in, I was singing full throttle yesterday while cleaning, then totally broke down because the words hit different, so maybe no music for a bit now x I’m ok after the cyclo thanks, I’m starting to feel a slight tenderness in some bones, just ‘aware’ of them, no pain, yet! But I’m assured that will change and will worry if it doesn’t hair is still in place, but also that could change, as usually around day 10 that could start dropping x
That’s a lot more palatable with the sepsis! That’s one of my biggest fears going forward, and my hospital is the worst performing in wales 
so we’ll see.
How are you managing with eating/drinking sweetheart? I’m struggling with water and anything other than mint tea! And appetite, other than for rubbish is none existent 
Official isolation is a good idea, very hard to deal with though x I’m glad the weather is good so you can walk sorry you aren’t sleeping well, this is the time you could do with it, hope you manage to get some today at some point x Are you isolating from hubby and children now? Because I can imagine how hard that will be for you x is someone taking you on Monday? Xx
I hear you! I was full pelt singing Mariah Carey’s Hero when it popped on the radio the other day and my throat just seized when I thought about what I was singing. I carried on and cried through the singing, it was therapeutic, must have looked and sounded horrific -luckily I was in the house on my own . Sometimes it’s good to get those pesky tears out! Don’t give up on music. I’m waiting for your Friday Forum choices! 
Re the Sepsis my CNS was there with me and lovely Doc and I must have looked a bit wobbly through the convo, she said but you’re an in patient and we are expecting it to happen, so we are looking for it constantly. Made me so grateful for my care decision! The likelihood is greater while you are in hospital so try not to worry about your local hospital as you’ll be in The Christie anyway, the risk should drop considerably by the time you are well enough to go home.
Xx
@Byrnebaby re isolation- my hub has already decamped to the guest room and bathroom as he has a sniffle from school. I’m pretty much having meal times with them all and disappearing after. Thank goodness the weather is good because over the weekend I can open the bifolds and sit in the family room with them all xx
I haven’t had any issues with eating or drinking. I snack on pears, bananas and satsumas, love a peppermint tea. I’ve been having the odd glass of Roses lime cordial with ice water which is soooo refreshing in this weather. The physio team at UCLH are partnering with the nutrition team to prepare a revamped prehab and rehab program, is it worth checking with your CNS at The Christie to see if they can give you any suggestions? Xx
Morning @Byrnebaby so glad to hear you are feeling brighter.
In my experience it does get easier to deal with it becomes your new normal.
You got this onwards and upwards as they say. Have a wonderful bank holiday weekend.
Ugly crying is becoming the norm here @Spangleystar yes, it does us good to get it out, but it’s just sooo freaky to go from plodding on and being ok, to a 5 minute meltdown then back to ok again, it’s quite surreal isnt it? I’ll have to try your song mine yesterday was One Republic 'I lived ', but I must admit , I did also play that song at Bilbo’s garden funeral 
so maybe that came into play as well x
I’m glad they took the time to explain it to you so well, and this is one thing my hubby is happy about, he can ‘relax’ knowing I’m being looked after properly, for however long, because they won’t let us go if there’s an inkling of anything x so very glad you chose to be admitted, as I’d read about all these things that ‘could’ happen x also lovely- has your NHS trust not issued you with a leaflet/alert card to hand in at a&e just in case you have high/low temperature to treat for NS and not waste time waiting for bloods? Xx
Ohh I’m glad you will still be able to be with your family and not be totally isolated until Monday xx 
Oh great suggestions re; food thanks, yes I will have many chats with Christie’s, want to come out of this all
