I lost my 84 year old dad in March 2024, to Multiple Myeloma and ultimately kidney failure. My dad suddenly had a back back in January which became worse after a week or so and we took him to A&E. He was admitted and stayed in for 10 days and was diagnosed with degenerative disk disease. He was discharged ‘clinically well’ in the hospital’s words. He was given morphine and gabapentin to take for his back and nerve pain in his leg. He had lost weight and appetite and my mum would feed him as he was too weak to bother himself. We actually put his condition down to the painkillers he was taking zoning him out, because some days he would walk not using his zimmer frame and we thought he was slowly getting better. Then in week 3 at home, he had Acute Kidney Injury and we had to take him again to A&E, where he was seen after 8 hrs wait with suspected MM aswell. My dad was kept in and monitored for 3 days when we were told he would need dialysis to survive, but even then wouldn’t make it to Christmas. He would also have to have stayed in hospital as he was too ill to make the 3 trips per week to the hospital for the treatment. It was decided to try Conservative treatment and hope for the best. 2 days later my lovely dad passed away. We were told he had light chain myeloma that had rapidly produced in his blood and attacked his organs, especially his kidneys. I had never heard of MM before and the speed of my Dad’s deterioration was such a shock. He was fit, young for his age and looked after himself. We are heartbroken. I have read a post from 2022 where someone’s loved one died within weeks and that really helped me understand how aggressive myeloma can be. I could not comprehend the speed it killed my dad who we all thought just had a bad back.
Dear @Croberts, a big welcome to our forum. I’m so sorry to hear of the sudden passing of your Dad. Thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad that you’ve found us and are finding some comfort in hearing from others that have shared similar experiences. We are here and there is more support and information available to you if you want to talk to someone (Blood cancer information and support by phone and email | Blood Cancer UK). Sending lots of love x
Oh @Croberts I am so sorry for your loss and thanks so much for taking the time to write your post it cannot have been easy.
Things just progressed so quickly, some conditions are so aggressive, what a shock for you all.
We are here to support you, please do use us to say how it really is for you.
The Blood Cancer UK support line is there for you on 0808 2080 888
Really be very kind to yourselves, we all grieve in different ways.
Thankyou Maggie for your reply, it was so difficult to talk to anyone at the hospital to understand what happened over my dad’s illness and after he died we were all in too much shock, it’s only afterwards I started to question what happened and this support here is very welcomed and helpful so thankyou.
Thankyou Erica for your reply, these forums and websites are so helpful, I’ve said to Maggie, sometimes when a loved one dies we don’t have the answers we really need which prolongs the hurt and this site has helped me already have some questions answered. Thankyou for the blood cancer number too.