To be honest most of the staff involved in my treatment have been amazing and I have felt really supported. The only thing I would say I wish was different would be the support from a psychologist or counsiler to be more readily available. As I was seen as a ‘specialist case’ they wanted me to be seen by the psychologist in one of the hospitals out with my town around 1.5 hours away instead of the team at my local hospital only 5 minutes up the road. Due to this I have turned down this offer. I have so many apts and I still rely on hospital transport that one appointment turns into a full day of travel and waiting for other patients who are traveling with you to finish their appointments.
Speaking of travel this has been very hard to cope with aswell as I have no one that can take me on a regular basis l. The hospital transport has taken people on board who have not stated that they are unwell. Quite a few people in my clinic have become ill from travelling with other patients. I’m anxious every time I go that I’m going to catch something. I’ve had 5 viruses throughout the winter. Would be great to know what everyone else does for travel to and from hospital when they can not drive themselves?
Oh I’m rambling onto other subjects haha as far as the fertility side of things goes I wish I had support from a specialist like a psychologist from the very beginning as I found the loss of fertility the worst part about the whole process. I broke down several times in the beginning I wish I would of had a professional to speak to during this time …
@Goody I’m so pleased to hear that you had a positive experience with your treatment team, that must make such a difference. And Goody, from your experience and the experiences of some of other lovely forum members, it is definitely clear what a vital role emotional and psychological support has in many aspects of a person’s treatment and experience.
And you’re not rambling at all! I can double check to see if we have a thread relating to travel which could be of help? and if there isn’t, i’m more than happy to start one for you? you are also very welcome to start it you prefer
Goody for sure you need someone to really talk to about this. A lot depends on how well you know your friend who may well be feeling Akward herself. You might find opening up togeher to strengthen your friendship. But I’d practice first. You might find for example if you rang the helpline just the act of talking to one of the wonderful advisors about how you are feeling would help you know how you’d want to approach this or not with your friend.
This is a loss a huge one and it’s not something that will go away or you can pretend isn’t there. But you might find a pathway to genuine joy with your friend.
The other thing that’s worth considering in the longer term is fostering or adoption (not yet). But I’m getting the feeling you are a wonderful mum who has more love in their heart to give to another. Who knows maybe as this one door has closed another might open to you down the line when you feel ready. It’s just something to think of and for sure even if you don’t foster or adopt you will find other opportunity to exercise your love towards other children. At first of course seeing other kids might trigger your pain. But over time hopefully at some point you’ll be able to enjoy caring for kids again.
Life is different now.
But there are chances to build a different future for yourself one small step at a time.
Re hospital transport I ask for the front seat if possible. I open a window a chink and try and breath the fresh air. And sometimes I wear a mask. Also when I was neutropenic I was able to get my nurses to add my name to the list for those who should be given a single car. You could speak to your clinical team about how bad your immunity is and they might be able to do that. Some hospitals will give the dedicated car service out more readily than others.
Thanks Adrian, my husband and I have been talking about fostering or adoption. I wouldn’t foster until my children were older but once I’m feeling better in a few years adoption might be an option. I know it depends on the type of cancer you have had wether that may effect my chance to adopt or not I’m not sure.
Honestly I’m too sacred to say anything to my friend because it could end badly and we will both end up even more awkward. I’m think once the baby is here I’m going to have fun playing aunty haha
Life is different now …its something I need to get used to! Xx
Oh that’s great I will ask my Dr at my local hospital re transport. He did mention them trying to sort out other transport but that was before Christmas and I’ve had so much on I haven’t had the chance to ask him about it again. Sitting by the window would probably at least make me feel better!
@Goody Hi Goody, I just checked, we don’t have one at the moment, so what a great time to start one! haha Do let me know what works best for you, we can start one for you no problem- but you are also welcome to create one in your time, worded how you like
@Adrian very true! as you say, there is more choice and more options now, which is wonderful thing! And as you and @Goody both touched on, the main thing when considering other options is to do it when you feel ready within yourself
Hi everyone. Just picking up on this thread. I had 2 children when I was diagnosed in my early forties so didn’t really have any plans for more children. I had to go to transplant quite quickly, and I guess that became the focus and the loss of fertility/early menopause was presented as more of a side effect of the treatment. It feels weird to have almost had an instant menopause rather than progressing through a natural stage.
But I’m aware I’m very fortunate to have been at that stage in my life, rather than needing to undergo harsh treatment and ending my reproductive life abruptly. I think for younger women that must be much harder to deal with, and I’m not sure how much support women in that position are offered.
I can double check to see if we have a thread relating to travel which could be of help? and if there isn’t, i’m more than happy to start one for you? you are also very welcome to start it you prefer 
