It does sound as though they have been pretty good. So - what are your plans? Are they some things you can plan in to look forward to once you can get out and about a bit more? It must feel strange. I know you haven’t been at work for a while but knowing you are not going back is quite different isn’t it.
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That horrible waiting for results! I don’t know about you but don’t think it ever gets any easier! Pleas let us know how you get on x
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Great to hear from you, @parkrunmark. I worked for 20 years in my department and 5 years after diagnosis and I was struggling with fatigue. The department had to make cutbacks so by mutual agreement my job was made redundant, which equated to early retirement. I definitely felt ‘cut off in my prime’ although it turned out to be really liberating as I had not realised but I did not deal well with the things that personally stressed me.
What I would say is to ensure you get a reasonable package and take advice if you are not sure what you are entitled to.
For me I would probably have mixed emotions, I missed the social side of work, which I am also missing shielding now, and also the Covid ‘being so vulnerable’ feelings as well. On top of those feelings there is that anxiety which whizzes back before, during and after medical appointments, that waiting game is the worst. Please let us know how it goes with work and with your bone marrow biopsy. Are you managing to get in any park running?
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Hi Nichola and Erica
No plans really, just enjoy feeling good again ,we live in West Wales so plenty of beautiful places to visit safely.
I did love my job and the last few weeks have made me so anxious, feelings of guilt,letting them down etc I have almost worried more about work recently than having cancer the last few years which may sound a bit silly.But now I have made my mind up I seem to be relaxing again. I have a wonderful supporting wife and family and hopefully my health again so I have a lot to be grateful for.
Mark
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That’s our next place to visit with the girls. Wales does look so beautiful! I know that feeling of guilt and letting work down. Still feeling it now. I’m returning next week (part time to start) and feel awful about that - feel like I’m still being a pain when not going back full time! Sometimes, things get better once a decision is made don’t they and the pressure eases. Hopefully it will be just as liberating for you as it was for @Erica x
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Hi there. Good to hear from you again. I had to retire early aged 52. NHS pensions were great and went above and beyond. However I cannot say the same for Teacher’s pensions who reckoned there was no reason why I could not return in the future. My consultant soon put them right as I was in last chance saloon with my SCT. Good luck
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Hi all, I’m now really back at work - although still working mostly from home but have more and more face to face situations that I just can’t avoid. I wish I had a occupational health doctor or that my consultant would be interested in so much that would give me some tips how to keep myself safe out there. Because I don’t have that I just have to do things that come my way - of course being sensible, wearing face mask and gloves… needless to say that I am feeling very anxious at moment…
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I bet you are feeling anxious @MoMo, but it sounds as if you are being sensible and if a situation doesn’t feel comfortable it is OK to say so, you know your situation, perhaps others don’t. Perhaps a Blood Cancer UK badge and even a mask would be useful. Please keep letting us know how it is for you.
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Hi @MoMo - what is it that you do? I was just wondering, did they complete an individual risk assessment for you for when you have to have face to face meetings etc?
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Hi @MoMo, @parkrunmark, @Franko, @SP7, @SP7, @cazz, @Nichola75, @pisces56 and @SuBloodcancerUK . I was thinking in the bath today and perhaps there is another angle to going back to work and it might be controversial. I am not an employer I have to say.
We, because we have blood cancer, know all about it and the problems and considerations we, or our family member, live with, but perhaps the employers might have never even have heard of blood cancers and are completely unaware that if we are immunocompromised or immunosuppressed the far greater risks we run from if we get Covid.
I think I remember when the Covid outbreak started and the Government Health professional made the speech about Covid and who was classed as vulnerable it actually mentioned blood cancers patients as being at risk. Now by the we seem to be classed as very or extremely vulnerable.
Perhaps it is up to us to educate the employers why we or our family member, is far more at risk if they catch Covid than many other conditions that are classed as just vulnerable. There is some very useful information on the Blood Cancer UK website.
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Hi @Erica. A really interesting conversation to start and I’m sure the responses will be completey different depending on different workplaces, the relationships people have with their colleagues, the support people have been given and the amount of information people have shared about their diagnosis.
Firstly, I think a lot depends on relationships. I am good friends with my team (Including my boss) so have always shared quite a lot with them and feel they understand my risk. I know they have read up on things themselves and I have shared articles when I have thought they may be useful to them. However, I think understanding the emotional impact may be a completely different story and feel this is where lots of employees need educating.
Secondly, I think I’ve realised that the people that understand less are the people I have explained the least to. This has never really bothered me before because I chose who I wanted to tell and how much I wanted to tell them, but now I am returing after shielding I kind of wish I’d been more open with more people.
So, whats my plan??? Tomorrow when I go to work I will wear my shielding/social distancing badge which is a big thing for me because I’m putting myself out there. If this prompts questions I’ll answer them and if it doesn’t at least it will make people more aware.
I’m really interested to hear what others say about their experiences.
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The bath is always great for thinking!
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@Nichola75 since I’m sort of a self-employed, so although I have seniors in my organisation, the risk assessment is on me, and that’s what’s most stressful. Although I know my illness, I am still new to it and really would love to have a little bit more input from my medical team. I have my next appointment on Monday and I hope I’m seen by my usual doc so that I can have these discussions. I also have phone appointment with a GP, just hoping it’s one those who are understanding and willing to discuss about my anxiety 
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@Erica I totally agree with you that we are “experts” of our illnesses and have to educate others including the employers. However, because I don’t have usual employee trappings to rely on, I am kind of left in limbo and I need my medical teams input so that I can be sure that what I do doesn’t increase my risk. Yet, between my monthly appointments, if I contact my medical team to ask about something, I never hear anything back and that’s why my anxiety has now gone over the roof… anyway…
Have a good day everyone!
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Hi @MoMo. It’s great that you have appointments coming up. Write down all those questions you want answered and let us known how you get on x
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Hey @MoMo I have everything crossed that you find your upcoming appointments helpful - it’s so understandable that you want more input from your team. It must be hard not hearing back when you really want something answered. Do you have a number you can call for them?
I’d second Nichola75’s suggestion around writing your questions down in case trying to remember everything you want to discuss with them gets a bit overwhelming. Let us know how you get on 
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So, first day back and exhausted but it was ok. People were really sweet and social distancing was good. It was nice to have my mind occupied with something else for a few hours. Hoping I might be so exhausted that I’ll sleep! . Let’s see how it goes when the children return!
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Oh @Nichola75, I am glad today was OK, yes, everyone sounds sweet. Please let us know how your children got on and how your night’s sleep goes.
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I have had a good couple of days back. We have INSETs all week so no students until Monday. All training is being completed via zoom. Good to ‘see’ people and get back into routine. I may feel differently once the students are back. 
Thanks Alice. Yes, it is frustrating when I don’t hear anything back from my medical team, but it has been the same from the beginning (almost a year now). It was easier when my appointments were in the hema department but now I’m seen in the different hospital’s outpatients. I shall indeed write and have been writing everything down as my brain tends to go mushy when I’m at the hospital. I will let you know how the appointment goes next Monday. But now I have 4 intense days at work ahead of me… 
and sleepless nights don’t help.
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