New to the forum a bit scared and confused over diagnosis

Hello
I have just been diagnosed with MF
I am a bit worried about telling my friends and family as I don’t want to be treated differently?
Do I use the word Cancer or should I avoid it ?
I don’t want a fuss etc
Is this all normal?
Thank you

1 Like

Hi @Iain8 a great big welcome to our forum and I think your post is completely normal and very caring.
I attach the Blood Cancer UK details on telling family and friends.
Telling family and friends you have blood cancer | Blood Cancer UK
Telling family and friends is very individual, depending on you relationships.
I found it difficult to tell family, friends and work as I could not explain what I did not understand myself.
Very personally I would rather I called it a blood cancer than they found out via Google.
Again very personally I think if you can tell them quite naturally then that is the way they will receive it.
I think it is natural that the other person will not know how to respond.
Perhaps be open to them asking questions.
Obviously telling younger children then just tell them in a way that they can understand.
I did feel I was not just seen as ‘Erica’ but ‘Erica with leukaemia’ for a while, but hey, ho.
Anyway how are you doing and feeling?
We are here for you so please do keep posting as I look forward to hearing more about you.

1 Like

Iain8 The decision on who to tell about your diagnosis is a very personal one. You will have hospital appointments so may need time off work. When I was diagnosed with Polycythaemia vera (PV) I was given a booklet about it and found this really helpfull to give to my family. Maybe this is something you could do. Also your treatment may cause side effects which your family may notice and worry. I had to stop work as a result of side effects. All of my family know except my mum who is 91 nearly 92. I am on new treatment now and will be assessed soon by occupational health to see if I can return to work. I don’t think there is a right or wrong way to come to terms with your diagnosis. The unknown is scary for both you and loved ones. For me I made the decision who to tell based on how I would feel if I hadn’t been told they were ill. People don’t like to be kept in the dark and then imagine the worst scenario. Sorry for the ramble. Wishing you all the best and welcome to the forum. Lizz59

1 Like

Hi @Liz59.
I can see you have had 2 great responses.
It really is a personal decision. You may need some time to get your own head around it. How are you feeling? It can be an emotional rollercoaster!
I told close family and friends and my leadership team at work as I knew I would need their support.
I completely understand not wanting a fuss. I think it’s hard when you first tell people as of course they are worried and want to help.
It’s always useful to give them imformation to look at so you don’t have to talk through everything.
Please keep us updated on how you are doing :blush:

2 Likes