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Approaching another anniversary of my diagnosis

Hello everyone. As another anniversary approaches, I wanted to share this poem with you. Please bear in my mind that my diagnosis was over twenty years ago, so I hope that more support is offered these days, but here is my description of how I felt …

THE BRIDGE
The bridge to my future
Destroyed in a flash,
My hopes and dreams
Cruelly dashed.
My sense of security
Washed away
On that memorable
November day.

How much longer
Had I got left to live?
This was an answer
No one could give.
Frightening conversations
I didn’t want to have,
Bewildering discussions
About bone marrow and blood.

Overwhelmed by
The uncertainty of it all,
I was offered no mental
Or emotional support.
Talk of an early menopause
Was hard to take in,
But with such a high platelet count
Treatment must begin.

No time to consider
All the implications,
Just instructions given
To take the medication.
No leaflet provided
By way of explanation,
I was left with a sense
Of shock and devastation.

How to get my head around
A disease I didn’t know.
What was I going to say
To the folks back home?
Hiding my anguish,
Trying to stay strong,
Keeping the lid on,
Like I’ve always done.

The bridge to my future
Was suddenly no more,
With no way of knowing
What tomorrow had in store.
If only I had realised
On that unforgettable day,
As the years went by,
I would find another way.

Hope this helps others. There is hope after a diagnosis. Warm wishes. Willow

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Oh @Willow gosh, I am so moved by your poem it just says how I felt, but some much more eloquently than I ever could.
!7 yrs ago and it came back to me in a flash, I have a tear in my eye and I am now going to reread it. wow, thanks so, so much for sharing it with us, I feel so honoured.

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Talented in words and pictures @Willow X

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Hi @Willow I see things very visually so your so telling artwork will be etched in my mind.
Thanks so much

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Thanks @Nichola75. Willow X

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Oh @willow that is such a moving poem and encapsulates how so many of us felt on our initial diagnosis, you are a true wordsmith xx

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Thank you @Lyn99 for your kind words. When I was first diagnosed I couldn’t put my feelings into words, but many years further down the line I understand the huge impact it had, but there is hope. Thinking of everyone out there especially if you are newly diagnosed. It’s a scary place but so grateful to Blood Cancer UK and this forum too. Willow X

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Thank you @Erica. Willow X

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Willow you are an inspiration to us all. Thku for ypur poem. Exactly how we felt.

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Thank you @Ruth2 for your kind words. Welcome to this community. I look forward to hearing more about you if and when you feel ready. It’s so kind of you to get in touch after I shared my poem. Warm wishes. Willow X

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@Ruth2 a great big welcome to our forum and I hope you will find a good mix of information and personal experiences.
There is a lot of information on the Blood Cancer UK website and also details of their support line, if you would like to talk to someone, we are also here to support each other.
You say that is exactly how ‘we’ felt, if you don’t mind me asking I would be very interested in hearing more about you and your situation.
Look after yourselves.

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I daren’t do anything like this as I was always terrible at poetry at school. I’m in awe of your talent!

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You have written a poem of what I wasn’t able to express when diagnosed 14ish years ago and you were able to able to put into words what I feel sure many people feel when first diagnosed, it’s wonderful how you did it. Thank you for sharing it. I am still here and the awful terror soon abated when I realised people have worse. So let us keep our chins up and live life to the full where it is possible.
Take care everyone and savour the good days.

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Thank you @Judith for your kind words. I am pleased that connected with what I expressed in the poem. Warm wishes. Willow X

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For me it was only a month ago…and I was much older than you. Sitting in the sunshine outside the pharmacy at the local hospital and seeing the capitals CYTOTOXIC…
Your poem reflects my recent reaction…

“No time to consider
All the implications,
Just instructions given
To take the medication.
No leaflet provided
By way of explanation,
I was left with a sense
Of shock and devastation.”

I was given information - a book and sheets of A4 paper - but your words express it all so well!

Thank you!

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Great @Modesigns you say it so well.

Thank you @Modesigns for your kind words and for sharing your own story. I feel for you. The early days following a diagnosis are so hard and full of so many emotions. I am glad that you found the poem helpful. Thinking of you and sending warm wishes. Willow

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Thank you …loved your meanings …so clearly summed up…I’m 7 yrs into diagnosis…3 yrs of treatment so far… I didn’t have words to describe how I felt …I just got very depressed but sought help to deal with it. Then I began to cope… medication …I was and am doing fine … it gives you a different perspective.
Thus year I was hit with a brain anyerisim and that did wake me up again
I describe it as my own mortality knocking on my door … but the angels…the medics saved me and still look after me… I have three angels my Haemotologist my Neuro consultant and my friend from work who picked me up from hospital and has visted me every day since I came home . I now have a new family because of this . I also see how my elderly mum’s life has improved as we have her family visiting and friends…life is so much better.

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Thank you @Hmc63 for your kind words. I am glad you found the poem helpful and that you now have a new family. I understand what you mean. Warmly wishing you all the best. Willow X

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@Modesigns @Willow Thank you for sharing your poems and experiences, what a great way to express emotion and support for one another.

Best Wishes
Jo

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