Lewisham where I live have now had their Christmas lights up for two weeks which is even earlier than normal. I found it very depressing and can’t even begin to think how I might “celebrate” Christmas after a year like this. What will others be doing? I doubt I’ll be spending it with family as households are not allowed to have guests.
It’s Christmas time - How are you feeling about Christmas? Will it look different for you this year?
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Hi @Franko, how are you doing? Yes, I don’t want to think about Christmas either. However, I am awaiting the birth of my first Grandchild any day now, so I have something to keep me going. I know it’s difficult, but have you replanned any of your trips that you were going on this year? Even in your head? I visit the Maldives, Barbados and lots of City breaks, in my mind, every day! I cannot wait to travel again - I just hope that my health holds up! Your town is very early with the Christmas lights! Perhaps they are just trying to inject a bit of cheer in this gloomy world we find ourselves in? Let’s not think too much about Christmas yet, as we well know, people like us have to take one day at a time
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Oh, @Lulu, I love the idea of travelling in your head, I bet the weather is lovely every day, all your outings go to plan and the food amazing.
Who needs to think about Christmas.
Please keep letting us know about the birth of your fist grandchild and your virtual travelling?
Hi @Franko, one of the advantages of not going near any shops is that I am not subjected to the continuous carols.
I have however got my Blood Cancer UK Christmas cards already.
I have to admit I do love to see festive lights and decorations.
I am a girl for my decorations in the flat.
I am lucky to live with my husband here and I am going to admit something now, I love my husbands family dearly, but I would really love a Christmas here with just ‘me and him’, the telly and chocolates.
I realise though for so many people it is a very lonely, depressing time of year, especially after the year of isolation we have all had.
Hi @Erica, hope you are well. I am going to keep on travelling in my head for the foreseeable- I’ll let you know where I go next! 
. I had one of those just “me and him” Christmas’s last year. I must say I really enjoyed it. Got up late, had some croissants, couldn’t be bothered to make the dinner, so we had bacon sandwiches. In the evening we had a meat and cheeseboard. There was no rushing around to be at someone’s at a certain time and we did absolutely nothing all day - Bliss. Not saying I’d want to do that every year, but it doesn’t hurt once in a while. Maybe you could start planting the idea now? See how it goes
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Oh, @Lulu, your Christmas sounded wonderful and yes, I have already planned my Christmas in my head !!!
Hi @Lulu, @Franko and @Erica. My two children love Christmas do it’s hard not to get excited. However, I must say if I can just stay in my pjs all day and not have to go anywhere I’d be happy. Off course I’ll miss seeing everybody lots and lots but pjs are quite appealing!
I understand it’s different when you live alone or may not have family close by. @Franko, you’ve had so much going on. I completely agree that this is way too early for Christmas lights! One day at a time is definitely my motto at the moment, sometimes just a couple of hour at a time. How has travelling been for you this week?
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Yes @Nichola75 having children in the house makes such a difference. We haven’t had any for a long, long time which I guess is why the magic has worn off. I know what you mean @Erica. I used to love all of us gathered around on Christmas Day years ago but as the years went by less and less of the family came. I’ve been really ill 2 out of the last 3 Christmases. I can understand the just wanting to eat chocolates and no fuss approach. In 2018 I was having 2 doses of chemo on Christmas week and my mum had just died so I didn’t venture to Birmingham but I found it strangely pleasant just being me. I booked into a hotel somewhere more green in between chemo days and just did what pleased me with no stress. It was very strange but I think secretly I’d been wanting to do that for years 
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I too am wondering how Christmas may look and feel. We normally spend it with my parents in Northern Ireland (hubby’s family from there too) - this year my dad will just have, hopefully, finished some gruelling chemo and radiotherapy (starting this Mon Oct 12) and the thought of not being able to go is heartbreaking. Whether there are Covid19 restrictions in place that mean we can’t stay with family or whether the mere fact that travelling places my dad at too high a risk (never mind hubby with his cancer). I’m determined to not focus on this just now tho and take it all a day at a time - we really can’t change what’s happening or might happen and our job, nearer the time, is to adapt and cope as best we can. Take care folks
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Hi @judesadventures, I will be sending your dad even more extra special loving virtual thoughts and a supply of hugs for both your parents and you and your family for when he starts his treatment on Mon 12th, please keep posting how he is doing and what it is like to be you so far away. Look after yourselves xx
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I love Christmas, the shopping, wrapping the presents and receiving and sending cards. I think this year it will be much more virtual. I hope we can plan to meet my daughters prior to Christmas in a park or open space to exchange presents, if not I’ll have an expensive postage bill! I don’t mind spending the day just me and my husband though I will miss seeing the grandchildren. I think once this is over I will just arrange for us all to go out for a meal - as the whole family would be 13 of us I can’t see that happening any time soon.
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Erica, I am well at present. Improving my IT skills by hosting our Support Group via Zoom. As I am in North West expect we will be in greater lockdown after the announcement on Monday. Thank goodness can do my exercise classes via Zoom, keep my brain occupied by learning Spanish and order food on line! Hope you are well too.
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Him @Joan, yes, I am quite happy in my little routine here, on line food shopping, a daily morning walk and pilates dvd’s keep me out of mischief.
Hello 
I’m new to this forum and am finding this wonderful site such a comfort in this surreal world as I have CLL.
My husband and I have been hunkered down since the end of February with outside visits from our family during the summer months.
I’m finding pleasure in the day to day and trying to stay positive but I know the winter months are going to be very hard.
Stay safe everyone x
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Hi @Snuze, I am so glad you have found this forum , you are certainly not alone now, I was diagnosed with CLL in 2003, at the age of 53yrs, I have have been lucky enough to have been on watch and wait ever since.
I have also been shielding since March, but I now go out for an early morning walk, masked up.
Yes, I think outside visits will probably be out in the winter ( I think I missed the summer somewhere) and as you say the winter is going to be very hard.
Luckily we have this forum for supporting each other and if you would like to talk to someone you can contact the wonderful Blood Cancer UK Support Services Team on 0808 2080 888 10am-7pm Monday-Friday and 10am to 1pm Saturday and Sunday or via email at support@bloodcancer.org.uk.
I look forward to hearing more from you, take care.
Hi @Snuze. Great to have you here. Yep, the winter months are going to be a little more difficult aren’t they! This is a great place to share with others who know how you feel. Looking forward to getting to know you . Are you managing to get out at all?
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Hi @Snuze. Good to have you on the forums. It is certainly going to be a very weird Christmas and winter irrespective of lockdown. I think January and February might feel worse as they are colder and usually have less in them to look forward to.
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Well, this is a strange one!
We’re in a 4 week lockdown to, hopefully, allow everyone to have a family Christmas.
But the Chancellor has extended the furlough scheme until March! What does this say? Are we in this until then?
I think we’ve decided that we’ll have our Christmas as planned.
As long as everyone is well & is symptom free for the week previous.
I fought so hard 12 yrs ago to stay here to be with my family & watch them grow into adulthood, watch them find partners, buy property, build their adult lives, give me grandchildren. That’s what gave me the determination to carry on through the gruelling treatment regime. It was my light at the end of my tunnel.
I can’t bear the idea of an isolated Christmas.
I need to give my gifts & watch them being received. Watch their faces as the gifts, chosen especially for them, are opened. That’s what it’s all about. Well it’s not what it’s ALL about!
It’s that comforting, caring, family togetherness I love.
What’s the point in carrying on in isolation & missing out on the things you fought to experience? Life’s for living!
I know I’m far luckier than the majority as I’m not neutropenic. I’m on minimum meds. So I know how lucky I am.
But how long can we go on like this? This virus is here, & probably for a long time. I know they’re talking about immunisation but I personally wouldn’t feel happy having the injection that’s not been vigorously tested previously.
Anyway is it a live vaccine? If so, I can’t have it anyway.
What are your thoughts about Christmas 2020?
I’m going to chance it, it means too much to me not to.
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Good morning @Corfu80. This is a tough one isn’t it and like you said, it depends on where you are in your journey. For me personally, I switch backwards and forwards. Off course I’d love to spend Christmas with all of the family, but on the other hand I think I’ve followed the guidance so far and it would be silly not to now.
I think another consideration for me is the anxiety, of not only myself but the people around me. I have a husband and two daughters, 11 and 15. They have found this last year hard. As much as I try to reassure them it’s only natural that they are worried about bringing something home. We have talked about Christmas and how it might look, and without any prompting they said it will be sad not to see everybody but they would rather I was safe and I get that. I really don’t think they would relax if we did it any differently. Obviously, if the guidance changes, we will rethink it.
Feeling isolated is awful and as I read your post I completely understood how you felt and the reasons you would want to be with your family this year, and every year that you can! Have you spoken to your family about it. I was just wondering how they felt about it all?I think this is such an important topic at the moment and am interested in how others feel.
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