Worried about Dad having chemo ( DVD )

Dads starting DVD treatment on Monday for his myeloma , I’m worried about how this will affect him as he’s 84 . He last had chemo over three years ago just after diagnosis but it was tablet form he had ( CTD ) . We’re just going into this as one appointment at a time but I’m so apprehensive and I’m sure he is , I’m the only one to take him to appointments and look after him so it’s sometimes hard for me , I’d prefer it to be me having treatment instead of him . He has been lucky until recently as he’s been on watch and wait for over 3 years until now .

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Hi @Anne-Marie it must be a very anxious time for you looking on and wanting to do all you can to help him. I’m sure he really appreciates all that you do for him. I know when I had chemo for Myeloma, there was no one around and I had to go through the whole thing on my own. Taking it one appointment at a time is a great way to deal with it. Don’t be afraid to have feelings about all of this for yourself as you count too, so be kind to yourself. Check in here whenever you need to and as always the Blood Cancer UK support are available if you need to offload too. Let us know how you get on.

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Hi @Anne-Marie I think it would be great if you check out with your dad how he is feeling, I wonder if you both actually have the same fears and anxieties.
For you being a carer is a really tough role, carers are the unsung heroes, but I love your attitude of only taking one appointment at a time
Be kind to yourselves and you have needs too and I expect you are juggling lots of things at the moment, perhaps a little ‘Me’ time is needed too and please keep posting.

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Sorry you had to go through it alone , that must have been very tough . Thanks for your reply .

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I think he worries more about how it’s more stuff being put on me with the travelling etc to appointments and it being an inconvenience , I’m his only family though and I’ll do whatever is needed of me even if it’s a lot on my shoulders sometimes . I also work full time and already after day 1 I feel guilty for taking time away from work . He needs bloods and a heart scan on Friday but luckily they’re at our local hospital which is really close , unfortunately the chemo is a little further away .

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Hi @Anne-Marie, thank you for sharing. I’m sorry to hear that it’s been a difficult time for you recently with your dad’s upcoming treatment. It’s very understandable to be feeling worried at times like this and sounds as though you’re doing all you can to support him. As @Franko has mentioned, you’d be very welcome to get in touch with us if it’d be helpful to talk things through at all. We’d be happy to support you; our support line number is 0808 2080 888. Best wishes, Tanya.

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Mini update , Dad had 3 rounds of the chemo last year , I think he was looking at having 8 but other issues appeared such as a blood clot in his leg which he’s now on blood thinners for and fluid around his lungs they was spotted when he was getting breathless regularly so they scanned him ( he also suffers from
COPD ) his haematologist stopped it as it had improved things in his blood so decided to see if it would keep things at bay like it did previously and he’s back on watch and wait again with telephone appointments every 3 months with the consultant. Next appointment is next week .

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Hi @Anne-Marie, thank you for the update about your Dad. It sounds as though he’s been through a lot. That’s good to hear he has an appointment soon- hope this gives you the chance to raise any questions and concerns you may have. We hope you’re doing okay yourself? Appreciate that it must be a lot for you, too. We’re here for you if we can be of any support at all (0808 2080 888). Take care.

Best wishes,
Tanya.

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Hi @Anne-Marie thanks for the update.
I think we are very complex beings as you show so well with your Dad’s medical conditions.
I always get anxious before appointments and tests.
Please do let us know how your Dad’s appointment goes next week.
Look after yourselves