Losing key medical people who have supported you

Hello everyone. I am feeling rather like a yacht that has capsized! In just under two years I have ‘lost’ Therapist due to ill health preventing them from working, a GP and Practice Nurse who both retired after 30 years of caring for me, a Clinical Nurse Specialist who changed jobs and now my Haematologist is also leaving. It is very hard when I have formed strong attachments over the years. I am very grateful to have had their support but devastated to lose them. Has anyone else had to cope with this? Thank you. Warm wishes. Willow

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Hi @Willow as I read your post I couldn’t help feeling that these losses of your key care givers are like multiple bereavements you are going through.
I have also gone through several GP’s, nurses and consultants over the years.
Yes, I have really had to deal with the losses over the years and actually I am remembering them like a picture gallery in my mind as I type this.
But actually a new clinician has usually acted as a 2nd opinion, some clinicians have been better, some not. What they can’t do is give me that continuity of care. I also haven’t been able to say a proper ‘Good Bye’ and thank you to most of them.
Thanks @Willow this is a really good, relevant post to start and you have really made me think.
I await the thoughts of others.


Hi @Willow. I remember my first therapist moving away after four years. Like @Erica said, I really felt like I’d had a bereavement. I know they are not family but all of those people you mention are people that have been so important in your life. I know I would feel the same if my consultant left. I think your feelings are completely valid and I’m sending you an extremely big hug X


Thank you SO much @Nichola and @Erica for your kind words and understanding. I know we can’t change what has happened but it means a lot to know you are thinking of me and, yes, you’re right, I suppose it is a sort of bereavement. Take care. Willow



So sorry to hear of this…

I can definitely empathise that sometimes you grow a lot of attachment to your medical team just like you would to a friend or family member. To lose suched support and knowledge that has grown over a period of time, to realise you got to do it all again, makes me think of snakes and ladders and this situation is like getting to the eighties or nineties to then roll and you’ve found yourself slithering down that huge snake, and when you find yourself back at the bottom, your first instinct is to flip the board over and say “sod this I ain’t playing no more”.

But like every sunset comes a sunrise… It maybe worse weather than the day before but then it maybe better…

Try not to hold any preconceptions over new people taking over, give them chance to build a positive repport with you, but with your experience of what you want now, be confident in knowing and getting what you want… unlike before they are the newbie now…

I feel for you big time, and hope you find some comfort soon…

Hang in there… You got this… :slight_smile:


@Rammie18 Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and for your kindness and understanding. It brings tears to my eyes, but in a good way! I like analogies like the snakes and ladders and find images like that helpful, so thank you for that. It is so thoughtful of you because I have read in another post of some of the tough struggles you are also coping with at the moment. Many blessings to you. Warm wishes. Willow


Hi I too have lost some key personnel. My first haematologist left after a couple of years but i had seen his replacement in the hospital and so already knew him. However after ten years with him I had a new consultant and because of covid have never met him. I have had telephone consultations and keep getting different doctors who I haven’t met and whilst I am in remission it has felt unsatisfactory. I also lost my dentist who I had been with for over 30 years and now the practice is large and corporate and I seem to see a different dentist every time I know they have upgraded the practice but it doesn’t feel as relaxing. My chiropodist also retired and i now have a young woman who is lovely so that feels fine. At the GP practice all the GPs there originally have since retired bit as this was more gradual I have not had the same ‘withdrawal’ and they are all very good.

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Hi @Joan, that is quite a number of people who you have lost over the years.
I had forgotten about dentists. I had one run of with his receptionist. Also as you mention my current dentist practice seems to change name, logo’s, upgrade it’s equipment, increase services and new dentists. When I last went they still had magazines and they did not have any magazines I fancied reading. That used to be the highlight of my visit.
As for opticians I do not think I have ever seen the same one twice.
My last pharmacy had a different duty manager every day so they had no commitment at all to providing a good service.
My current pharmacy is family run by quite a young family and they are lovely and brilliant although my husband has collected my monthly prescription for the last eighteen months so he knows them better than me!!
So many losses, thanks for making me think.

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Hi @Willow. How are you doing this week? Have you met any of the new medical professionals?

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Thank you @Nichola75. It is so kind of you to ask and think of me. I found a new Therapist (fortunately before lockdown) so we were able to meet face to face before Covid hit. It is now by telephone but it is working well and she is very good. I have a face to face haematology appointment at the end of this month but don’t know yet who I will see. Although I have a named GP, I don’t know her and she doesn’t know me, so I am still feeling a bit vulnerable. Thanks for asking. Hope you are doing okay. Warm wishes. Willow x

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Hi @willow, I am so glad that you have found a good therapist, yes, it is so important to have that connection to work together and I think it helps to have actually seen them in person before having to have telephone appointments.
I hope your haematology appointment goes OK at the end of the month and you see someone that suits you.
But you still do not have a relationship with your GP.
I am not surprised that you still feel vulnerable, but we are here to support you so please let us know how you get.

Hi @Willow. A new therapist who you feel comfortable with is a good start. Hopefully the new people who continue to become part of your team make you feel just as comfortable. I’m keeping everything crossed. Hopefully then, you’re mind will be even more at ease.
I’m good - 4 monthly check coming up so always makes me a little nervous, even though I have no signs or symptoms to suggest anything is wrong! Please keep us updated on how you are doing X

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