Hi, I just joined here and wanted to introduce myself. I’m Kurtis, I’m 41 and have recently been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma. I’m about to start 6 months ABVD chemotherapy in a couple of days. Pretty worried about that !
Will I ever get back to normal after this chemo ?
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Hi @Kurtis I am so glad you have found us and introduced yourself.
I am not surprised that you are pretty worried about starting chemo. I think the unknown is always scary.
I think your question about will you ever get back to your normal after your chemo is best asked of your medical team, they are the ones that know your medical history and perhaps even they might not feel they can answer your question.
We are all very unique special people.
I think the not knowing how you will be after chemo is also very scary.
Others might be able to share their personal experiences.
Please do keep posting how you are, it can feel very isolating going through treatment.
You are now part of our forum family.
If you feel you would like to talk to someone the Blood Cancer UK support line are there for you on 0808 2080 888.
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Hello @Kurtis
A big Welcome to the Forum.
I’m glad you have found us and taken a brave step of posting on here.
I am sorry to read you have a new diagnosis of Hodgkin Lymphoma, and are starting chemotherapy very soon. It’s perfectly understandable and very common, to be worried about starting chemotherapy. Dealing with a blood cancer diagnosis is hard enough, but then being told you need chemotherapy is overwhelming and provokes anxiety in most people.
The chemotherapy nurses, I am sure, will be used to administering ABVD and can reassure you and also best advise you on how to look after yourself whilst on treatment. Your Haematology team will also be monitoring you closely over the next 6 months.
Please do ask all of the questions you have, and raise your concerns with your team, they are there to help you and they know your individual circumstances.
In case it is helpful this link on understandingHodgkinLymphoma has more information and there is also a link to our weekly ‘newly diagnosed’ emails.
I’m sure there are others on this Forum that have had ABVD, that may feel comfortable to share their experiences of going through it and can reassure you too.
Remember you can call our Support Line 0808 2080 888 if you would like to talk to someone in our Support Services team, at any stage during or after your treatment.
Take care, and keep posting on how it’s all going for you.
Heidi.
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Hi, thankyou very much for your reply. I have agood team and will ask as much as I can. I start treatment on Tuesday morning, so the unknown won’t be there for much longer. I had about 6 weeks between diagnosis and treatment start, and made the error of trying to research the cancer/ABVD myself. Google is terrible ! I went from ‘I am going to smash this’ to very nearly cancelling the chemotherapy. Sorry for the long message. And thanks again.
Kurtis
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Hi, thankyou for your reply. Fortunately(ish) I start treatment on Tuesday morning so the unknown will be gone. Thankfully !! Google has destroyed my confidence in regaining my old self again. But I’m a fighter so we shall see. I will try to use the forum as much as I need to. I haven’t really got people to talk to about my cancer/treatment, so it’s of some comfort. Thankyou again
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So sorry @Kurtis that ‘Dr’ Google has affected you so much, sometimes there is quite a lot of misleading information out there.
People will only share their experiences on here.
I think personally it is very difficult to make a decision when I feel anxious.
Please do keep posting on here so your forum family can be here for you and I find they really understand me and what I am going through and feeling and don’t forget the Blood Cancer UK support line is there for you and I find they are lovely on 0808 2080
888
The main thing is that you are very kind to yourself and keep posting
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@Kurtis
In my experience, the perception is being treated for cancer means getting ill and being sick. My husband asked me this just the other day he asked “ do I just put a brave face on it all or is it not as bad as it seems”
The truth is. Everyone deals with treatment and the after effects differently. None of our bodies are the same.
Unfortunately, I had to give up running a hobby that I loved as I developed osteoporosis during treatment . So for me, it meant that working out — something I once loved — is no longer an option. I have to find other ways to feel like myself.
Having lymphoma and being treated for it amounted to the most traumatic experience of my life apart from the loss of my Dad. And I’m a firm believer in the fact that it’s completely OK not to feel OK
That said I think it’s so important to do the things that can make you happy. Even if it’s only once a week, taking the time to focus on yourself can make a difference.
So I found new hobbies like yoga and walking and they are now integral to my new post treatment lifestyle, I volunteer for BloodCancer UK here on the forum and the giving back is a great way to feel good.
It is just about adjusting to the new you and navigating though living life a little differently but you will get there. Take each day as it comes and you will find your new normal.
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Thank you so much @Jules for what you have written. Although I wasn’t the one who asked the original question, I agree with so much of what you have written. In my mind too, it definitely is okay not to feel okay and I don’t think we can experience a blood cancer diagnosis (with or without treatment as a result) and return to ‘normal’ - whatever that might be? These experiences change us and that doesn’t all have to be negative changes. Rather than the phrase ‘bouncing back’ maybe we can look at it as ‘bouncing forward’, finding new strength, resilience we didn’t know we had, and new ways of living. I read the phrase ‘bouncing forward’ a while ago and I rather like it! Warm wishes, Willow x
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Love it @Willow it is definitely bouncing forward finding resilience and that new normal.
Nothing stands still in life let’s face it would be very boring if it did. So I just look at it as change, some changes are good some not so , but it’s how we cope with change that matters. Bouncing forward with positive thoughts is definitely what helps me.
Keep on bouncing @Willow 
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What brilliantly worded posts @Willow and @Jules I am sitting here here saying ‘here, here’.
@Kurtis I was whizzing through life on autopilot and since diagnosis I have really got to know myself and my wants and needs. It is OK to say NO.
Yep, keep on bouncing sounds good to me.
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I had counselling which helped me grieve for the old me and then acceptance of the new me living with myeloma. I’m the same person just slower older and life adjuster to suit each new day
Love the bouncing forward @Willow
Back in 2017 my lovely palliative care nurse said to me as people are now living with cancer they were starting to look at how chemo affects the body long term.
I believe chemo fog is now recognised as an ongoing symptom in cancer survivors
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I love your description of counselling @2DB it is so true
It is a new day, enjoy it.
Please do keep telling us what you are up to and look after yourself
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Hi, Kurtis!
I came across Blood Cancer UK in conquest to my own 1-year and 7-month remission post 6-mo of ABVD chemo treatment questions and came across your story and wondering how you are doing. (That was a chemo brain mouthful)! For me, I’m still asking the question that you initially posted. My therapists have been working with me on accepting where I am.
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Hi @AeKyungYoo welcome to our forum
How are you feeling?
I really found that therapy helped me come to terms with my diagnosis and my new normal.
Since my diagnosis I have had the opportunity to look at my life and see what I want to do and with whom.
I have realised for me the best things in life are free like family, friends, music, nature, walking in the fresh air etc.
I was diagnosed 21 yrs ago but a birthday a few years ago was my best birthday ever.
Asking for help shows courage and a willingness, a very good start in my book.
I look forward to hearing more about you so please do keep posting.
Look after and be kind to yourself
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Hi, Erica!
Thank-you for such an expedient response! So, you’ve been living with cancer for 21-years?! Or, are you in remission?
Cancer came out of nowhere for me. However; when diagnosed, I didn’t flip out. I just went into planning mode and knew that cancer came into my life with purpose and invited the lessons into my life. However; post-treatments is where the confusion set in. Processing the journey has been filled with a lot of self-doubt, self-hate, frustration, etc… There are good days and bad days; but, have never forgotten that cancer came into my life with purpose. Now, it’s a journey in self-discovery in re-figuring out my purpose!
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Hi @AeKyungYoo I have been living with cancer for 21 yrs.
Yes when I was diagnosed I also went into planning mode I came home and wrote my will and funeral music.
Yes, I also have good and bad days.
Take your time on your journey of self discovery, I would say it is a never ending journey and I still aim to learn something new every day.
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Hi @Kurtis
There are some useful bits of information on the MacMillan site about life after treatment. I found it can all be a little overwhelming.
You definitely do get back to normal but it may be a new normal lots of organisations have great ways to describe your new normal after cancer treatment.
I know I never thought I would be back to running and going to the gym again but I did and do, maybe just a little adaptations are required . I dont do triathlons any more for sure yoga and Pilates are definitely more my thing but I have run again since my treatment.
I attended a live your life workshop with Lymphoma Action it was very helpful it taught me loads about myself and how to live post my treatment.
I made lots of changes one of which was about how I spend my time more constructively so I became a volunteer for Blood Cancer UK and the RSPCA.
I also went back to work pretty quickly which helped I think , but do take as much time as you think you need then add a month more on. It’s tiring ( more tiring than you think)
I am 8 years post treatment and unless you know know or spot the war wound scars no one ever knows that I have cancer.
You can and will come out the other side. All the best with your treatment.
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